October 29, 2007
Ten Benefits of the Two Referee, Two Linesman System

• No longer have to pay all those royalties to the guy who wrote "Three Blind Mice."

• Whistles can be tuned to different keys and in-game officiating crew becomes post-game barbershop quartet.

• Allows fans to make side bets on which ref calls more penalties and which linesman throws more guys out of face-offs.

• Trail official can help immobile defensemen to the bench for a line change.

• Conspiracy theorists have another guy to blame for hosing their team.

• Stock price rises for zebra-print garment manufacturers.

• What's more beautiful than the graceful skating stride of an official?

• With skyrocketing oil prices, having another guy to chip in for gas is a godsend.

• Gives NCAA larger selection pool for officiating Frozen Four games now that Steve Piotrowski has retired.

• Decided advantage in street rumbles with basketball officials (as if that didn't exist already).

Old Napkins:
Let us know
if we missed anything | Send this to a friend
© 2007, Inside College Hockey, Inc., All Rights Reserved